The way my mind works.

The other night, I was sitting in front of the television eating dinner and watching Two-and-a-Half Men. You cannot escape that show. It's ALWAYS ON. While I actually sort of liked it in the early days, it seems as though it (as all sitcoms eventually do) has become a parody of itself, and probably should have been canceled by now.

In the intro of the newer run of shows, they do this freaky morphing thing when the three of them are singing the theme song and the kid Jake goes from being about six years old to 16, or whatever he's supposed to be now. As I sat there watching something I knew was going to be painful, for no good reason other than I was too lazy to look for something else to watch, I had the following thoughts:

(1) Damn, how much longer can this show stay on the air?
(2) What if this trash stays on the air for another 30 years?
(3) By that time, they'd probably have to change the show's name to "One Men."
(4) They'd have to work on that morph, too.


  1. It's really true. We turn on the TV and I swear it's always on. Then the big guy starts singing the theme song and then I start singing it too and before you know it we are living the show right out in the open. Sad.

    Sometimes I watch it even though I know it's not entertaining me.

  2. Anonymous8:05 PM

    That and "Golden Girls" seem to always be on.. I mean how many times can we see Maude's face of hear the old lady say, "Picture it, Scicily 1942...."

    Johnny my friend, time for a jumprope..to jump with not hang with when tv's not so finest comes on (or never goes off)

  3. That's exactly why we don't have a TV.

  4. That and Law and Order but I actually enjoy Law and Order.

  5. That show is like that person at work who has coffee breath and no concept of personal space. It seems like no matter what, they're always RIGHT THERE.

  6. This show is on as often as "Full House" reruns were years ago. How that show managed to have an 8 season run is a mystery, especially with that horrible theme song.....

  7. I never liked that show. Jon Cryer never made the transition from geek to non-geek the way Patrick Dempsey did and Charlie Sheen is just creepy. I'm pretty sure your skeleton version of them is an improvement.

  8. Ick. I second Charlie Sheen being creepy.. he grosses me out. & the other weird thing is he makes like 4 trillion dollars an episode, who the hell watches that show on PURPOSE?

  9. kristina12:28 PM

    We actually do enjoy watching the early episodes, but the longer it's gone on, the grosser it's gotten, especially "Charlie's" life having so many parallels...

  10. Upstate Broad12:47 PM

    I don't think we have to worry about it going on too much longer. Given the number of arrests in his recent past, how much longer can Charlie Sheen really stay out of prison? And even if he does, there's going to be a PR shitstorm if they keep him on the air.

  11. Never cared much for that one.

    But you do raise an interesting point.

  12. Tay, it's as bad as Seinfeld and Friends were a couple of years ago.

    Lynne, I don't get that one. I don't think I've ever actually seen an episode of golden girls.

    KC, you're better off. And also a little weird.

    Island, the one thing about that show that bugs me is that BUNG BUNG sound they use.

    Kately, not to mention the horrible writing.

    BadAss, you're close. Now if that person got closer and closer every year, and their breath got worse and worse, and then finally they were giving you tongue as they talked to you, then that would be like two and a half men.

    Jen, that's the thing...they've pushed the stereotypes to their breaking point, just like they did with Friends. They're down to masturbation and fart jokes now. It's like ok, we get it. monica is the neat one, chandler's the funny one, joey's the stupid one, blah blah blah.

    Kristina, exactly. They keep trying get more and more crass, but gross-out jokes aren't a substitute for good writing.

    UB, one can only hope.

    Ed, I kinda liked it the first two seasons.

  13. Good post. Spot On.

  14. Teacup6:39 PM

    I completely agree with you. This show was so funny the first season. After that it just became lewd and gross. Why is smarmy-ness a substitute for good writing?

    Another show I can't watch is Rules of Engagement. I like Patrick Warburton and would watch him in something else but the David Spade character, the dirty minded one is so predictably cheap and smutty.

  15. Anonymous9:28 AM

    I live in Mexico, and sometimes when my grandson gets tired of watching Spanish cartoons, I switch over the American TV and guess what's on? It's that stupid voice that sings "Men" every 2 1/2 seconds. Smarmy is the perfect word for that show. And how twisted is the kid going to be when he grows up with Charlie Sheen as his example? Aargh, I switch back to Bob Esponja. Sponge Bob in Spanish is still better than that crap.