9/18/09

The best part of waking up..

....is Folgers in your cup.



In your cup. NOT on your desk, keyboard, mouse, lap, shoes and floor.



In your EFFING CUP.

Is that too much for me to handle? Apparently, yes. Yes it is.

Damn your retarded packaging and your creepy-weird crystalline structure, Folgers.

My keyboard is still crunchy and smells vaguely like the floor sweepings at Dunkin' Donuts.

26 comments:

  1. I'm feeling a little frightened that you know what the floor sweepings at Dunkin Donuts smell like.

    I adore your blog.

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  2. I once spilled about half of a Naked blue smoothie on the keyboard of my laptop. The Y and the P still stick.

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  3. love this one :)

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  4. So if the Folger's isn't in your cup, does your junk still smell like coffee?

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  5. Jodey, I did a lot of weird stuff in college for extra money.

    SRO, why was it naked?

    Karen, I love your eggs.

    KC, only if I get it wet.

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  6. oh dear...I'm very sorry, and I would have to say lots of curse words if that happened to me, but that made for one fabulous post.

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  7. I spilled a 32oz Killian's Irish Red on my wife's New Dell Laptop. Laptops don't like Killian's.

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  8. That's what you get for drinking instant coffee! I didn't even know they made it anymore! Get thee to a Starbucks!

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  9. LT, I know..I know...but sometimes when I'm at work and the cafeteria is closed and it's about 2:30 and I'm falling asleep at my desk, I have to break the glass and go instant because starbucks is a 30 minute round trip.

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  10. The universe is trying to tell you that instant coffee is for people who drive Buick LeSabres and are waiting outside Lowe's for it to open on a Saturday morning accompanied by a tiny woman in a polyester pantsuit with a white purse.

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  11. Have a straw handy? You could always snort the rest of the remaining coffee directly out of your keyboard the next time you need a caffeine fix.

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  12. About a year ago someone emailed me your post, "1977 JCPenney Walk Down Memory Lane" and was looking for it again for a good laugh. So that's how I found your blog. You are hysterical. Thanks for the laughs!

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  13. Anonymous2:19 PM

    Folgers?? Really?? That's creepy. There's nothing as bad as that thing that tries to pass for coffee... Oh! Sorry, I forgot: there's always Tim Horton's up here...

    Now, seriously, get yourself some good java... and don't spill it! (it could have been worse: you could have spilled the brewed liquid on your keyboard... and the rest.

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  14. Damn JV did you attack it trying to get it open or what? Darling if you're that violent in the morning I might suggest doling out your dose into your cup the night before :P

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  15. Anonymous5:24 PM

    It sounds like someone didn't have his coffee yet. Oh, wait, that was the whole point. Well, maybe you should get some coffee and that will calm you down. ;)

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  16. Anonymous5:49 PM

    You could do like I learned early on...open the jar, eat a teaspoon of the crystals, then drink hot water or not. Vroom vroom!

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  17. All I see is a keyboard that's properly broken in.

    It's fun when random crumbs are launched from your keyboard every time you hit the caps lock button.

    Nothing keeps you awake at work like a shard of Flavor Crystal embedded in your eye.

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  18. Well that sucks! Invest in a work coffe pot and buy some pods so you don't spill. (coffe pods, not aliens)

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  19. Anonymous9:38 PM

    Sorry but I laughed very, very hard. This is why I drink Coke Zero for breakfast. But only in the bottles, if it's in a can, I would spill it.

    Also, I got one of those plastic keyboard covers, they are awesome.

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  20. Is it possible that my clumsiness has rubbed off on you, though we've never met and live thousands of miles apart?

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  21. I have a box of Folgers bags - kinda like tea bags, only with coffee - for when my parents visit. More expensive, but probably less messy.
    I work for a law firm that gives us good free coffee (Keurig machine). It's one of the benefits they don't tell you about when hiring and probably doesn't cost them that much in terms of the total bottom line, and yet it can make up for so much.

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  22. Alli, they won't let us plug anything in at our cubes. If they see it, they confiscate it.

    HGH, I will have to get some of those.

    Shine, Now that you mention it, I never had problems like this until you started reading my blog.

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  23. Good Gawd man, your in IT, Just sweep them up and eat them...who needs freaking H2O...

    Greenduckiesgirl has a rubber on the keyboard...greenduckiesgirl has a rubber on the keyboard!

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  24. um, what exactly are folgers crystals? are they anything like dilithium crystals?

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  25. Lone_Amaruq11:23 PM

    It's a crunch-a-muncha keyboard!
    ^^,-teehee
    PS I read you all the time, but you don't even notice!..

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  26. If you comment, I would notice! :)

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