OK, so it appears that Enzyte has some stiff competition these days. I was listening to the radio on the way home from Boston, and I heard no less than ten commercials for this herbal supplement called Procylon, which has all the standard longer, fuller, firmer claims that Enzyte makes.
The reason I thought this commercial was hilarious is because they toss another claim in there that I've never heard before:
"Longer, fuller, firmer, more frequent erections!"
I can only speak for myself here, but the marketing department seems to be missing the mark a little bit. If I were having erectile dysfunction issues, the one thing I wouldn't care so much about is frequency.
I just want it to work when I need it to -- I don't necessarily need more of them.
I don't want to be walking through the international foods aisle at the supermarket, minding my own business, and suddenly --- THWACK! -- knock a box of Ortega taco shells off the shelf.
I'd be thinking, "Son of a bitch! Not another one! That's like my 13th today! You'd think once or twice I'd actually be in a position to use the damn thing when it happens, but no."
What if I happened to be looking at the Apolo Ohno Wheaties Box at the time, or even worse, at Captain Crunch or Frankenberry? That shit could scar you for life, not to mention the fact that if anyone saw you, they would probably call the police.
So listen up, Procylon marketing department -- stop trying to pitch me on frequency, ok? Unless your pill can get me more frequent opportunities for sex along with more frequent erections, we have nothing to talk about.