Kellogg's makes a "Fruit-Flavored Snack" that ties into the hype for the newest Superman movie. A package of these were given to me recently by the 3 year old son of a friend of ours. They are along the lines of gummy bears, and there are a few different shapes. While most of them are the standard amorphous blobs you are used to seeing, Lex Luthor looks like this:

I am all for realism in my candy, but holy crap. This thing would scare the living shit out of a small child.

I half expected to hear crunching bone when I bit into it. It's the first candy I ever had that seemed actively pissed off that I was eating it. The whole time I was chewing, I felt like he was just waiting for a chance to get lodged in my throat and kill me.

How did it taste? I think it was supposed to be grape, but it was kinda bitter and almost devoid of any grape-like flavor, natural or otherwise.

My advice to you -- avoid Lex Luthor's head if at all possible.*

*That sounds pretty gay.


  1. Maybe he's pissed because they gave him like 7 chins. Seriously you have to wonder what the people at this company were thinking. Is there a huge market for people wanting to eat things that look like humans? I can't believe you ate it. I wouldn't have been able to.

  2. I never comment here. It's a crime, but I'm excusing myself on the basis that I wasn't a regular reader until recently. (I was also waiting until I had a post up that I wouldn't mind being your introduction to my blog.)

    But the double whammy of a fan-friggin-tastic clown mockery post and for voicing my thoughts in the form of wondering whether there was bone under that head* you gets a comment. This one.

    Well done. I think somebody just might find himself on Mis Blogo's Favoritos: the highest internet honor you weren't aware of.

    - Scott

    * They could have easily done "bone" with peanuts and/or nougat. Talk about a lost opportunity.

  3. What is with the term "living shit" - I mean, really, is it crawling, growing or breathing? - Now that would be scary....

    Lex's head - hmmmmmm...

  4. Lol that is the kind of candy that will stalk you at night and eat YOU.

  5. Anonymous8:46 PM

    My first thought was that I could immediately tell that THAT Lex Luthor wasn't portrayed by Kevin Spacey. Then I was concerned that they had managed to acheive that much realism with what is probably a combination of horse hooves and rubber.

    In fact, I would go so far as to say I am 100% certain that that's Gene Hackman's head you're biting into. Well done. I've wanted to gnaw on him for AGES.

  6. Whoops, sorry...that anonymous shouldn't be. Tis I!




    You know. Me.

  7. Sarah -- it didn't bleed. Much.

    Nessa -- I was halfway through the comment and I knew who wrote it.

    STH - thanks man.

    Heather -- I have no idea. dead shit doesn't have the same ring to it.

  8. JV - I hope that's because of my unique writing 'voice'...which I totally have. Totally.

  9. Kids' cereal is gross. My 5-year-old grandson loves something called Mighty Bites, which looks like cat food.