11/7/07

This is how you know you live in the sticks.

34 comments:

  1. I can hear the banjos already

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  2. heh? you only get to eat breakfast once in a while? or it's a breakfast to raise money for wood?

    i am really tired, so i'm sure i'm missing something, but i don't get it.

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  3. It made me laugh because the big raffle prize is wood. It just assumes that would be valuable because 99 percent of the people around here use it to not die in the winter.

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  4. I live in the sticks too and they have lots of things like this at our Fire Dept and Ruritan Club. They prefer holding the spaghetti dinners though as opposed to breakfasts. Normally they will raffle off..not firewood, but a gun. A gun?? The thought that some of these freaking reneck idiots in my town walk around with guns, just scares me to death.

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  5. ooops, I missed to D in redneck....didn't want you to think I was one too.

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  6. Oh Man! Sweet! I could use a cord of wood.

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  7. Nice, where I live we can just earn pesky money. A cord of wood is much handier. Or it would be if I had a fireplace.

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  8. See, this is why they need to hire an ad agency. The message is too vague.

    Are they raffling off the wood, or does $1 buy you both the wood and a raffle ticket? And if so, what is the prize for that raffle? Yet more wood?

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  9. nessa8:33 AM

    i like wood.

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  10. Gotta love Greenfield!!

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  11. Hey I know where Porter Corners is! :) If you live there you're not far away at all! And yeah right there in that Sacandaga corridor I hear faint banjos playing in my head everytime I'm up there.

    Our fire department raffled off 1/2 a pig once! I wondered if I could choose which 1/2?

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  12. I'm with Rickey on the vagueness of the message here. Is it $1 for four raffle tickets to win one cord of wood? Or $1 for one raffle ticket to win four cords of wood? Because I think that last one is a better deal if you have the storage space.

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  13. I went up into northern Michigan this summer and saw a sign that read:

    Steak fry Fri. 5:30 pm
    Live bait Ammo

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  14. Sign nailed to a tree on winding mountain road
    "quilt scrapes"
    with phone number, of course. My neighbor attended a family fun fest in the sticks that included an axe throwing competition for kids. Most likely had a kegger as well.

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  15. "Not to die in winter"

    Right. We hauled just shy of 4 cords of wood last Saturday morning -- and I'm a graphic artist.

    --And I play the ukulele, no banjo.
    ;)

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  16. Anonymous11:45 AM

    Hey, wood burning stoves are the new "it" in heating options, and you can heat your pool too. So I'm no redneck and it would sure free up my Saturday to not have to chop 4 cords.

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  17. JV-
    Long time reader, first time poster. Just so you know, I wasn't one of the crazy and/or kinky s.o.b.'s that found your blog through googling about being forced to wear a butt plug...I wear it on my own free will. Just kidding. Keep writing...it's good stuff.

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  18. would the people in your town also have a horse shoe pit on their side yard? everyone gets to together for a good night of SHOEING? ha ha ...

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  19. I hope you dont live BY that sighn

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  20. No, I don't live by the sign, but I do have a friend who lives up that way so I drive by once in a while.

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  21. I didn't say burning wood means you're a redneck, I just mean they know their audience.. Now if they stacked it for you, I would be all over that.

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  22. Got wood?

    Everyone needs a little hardwood now and then.

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  23. My mother-in-law used to spend $1 a week entering the Meat Draw at the Legion. Smoky room full of bighairs and truckers. One of them would hold up a huge slab of drippy dead animal. Everybody would ooh and aah; purses would open; carnivores would salivate; sons-in-law would escape to the washroom.

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  24. I think I am the one who first brought up the word redneck. Although not in reference to burning wood, but in reference to my community in general. My community...in West Virginia people, WV is littered with rednecks, ever seen Deliverance?
    We burn wood, just got a whole dump truck load delivered this week and I pride myself on not being a redneck. And I have all of my teeth....and my husband is not a blood relative.

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  25. Denise3:46 PM

    Wow JV...I sure am glad I got your link from a rubber stamping site (of all things) My son thinks I'm going crazy...the JC Penney post was the link but I have just spent a LONG time reading some of your other posts and laughing until my stomach hurts! You are now at the top of my favs. I really needed this after a long week. Keep it up.

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  26. Anonymous11:59 PM

    It makes sense johnny - if the raffle prize is a bunch of sticks, you must live in the sticks.

    That rationale means you don't want to be living in the shits.

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  27. Anonymous2:19 AM

    I love it - I can remember my graduation class raffling off 2 cords of wood!

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  28. Huh huh, you guys said WOOD!

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  29. this is entertaining. i lived in upstate ny for a while and a wood fire was really the best way to go. specially for cliche'y snowy nights, ya know sitting in front of a woodfire with hot chocolate and all. but call me stupid, how much is a cord of wood? we called it logs or sticks or other names i cant quite remember but how much is a cord?

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  30. Excellent Blog! I was brought to you by the infamous JCP post and have been reading through and laughing my ass off :)

    However, I seem to have misplaced the post about the web site that you can take a picture of yourself and turn it into several different things-including a gorilla.....

    I'm guessing I clicked around on some links in your posts and came across it since I can not track it down in a logical manner....Help!!

    Sorry to put this here-I tried to use the "contact" info but it says you don't have an AOL account :/

    A fan in NJ :)

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  31. Nessa6:54 PM

    oi ducks! Guess what. I finally got the viral email forwarded to me by a friend. It's officially reached critical mass.

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  32. I don't live that far from you, though on the other side of the NY/PA line. I never thought I'd see the words GUN RAFFLE so many times on a sign until I moved up here.
    Those, and ATV's. Even now I have a ticket burning a hole in my wallet for a Polaris 450 Sport. Whoo hoo. Drawing is December 17th.

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  33. 4 cords of wood for a buck?!! You can't beat that deal. Heck, it might even be worth it to buy 2 tickets!

    You're right. Only someone who lives in the sticks can properly appreciate the significance.

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  34. I so very much miss living in the sticks . . .

    A winter of cozy fires? For the cost of a raffle ticket?! You would have to be retarded NOT to do it.

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