I think my new glasses are adversely affecting my ability to see without them. Yesterday, I was eating lunch standing at the kitchen counter and thumbing through a mail order catalog (the way I probably eat 85% of my lunches when I'm at home) and I saw a shirt in the Signals catalog and immediately thought, "Wow, you'd have to have no doubts at all about your status as a whore to wear that one."
Somehow my less than stellar vision worked with my twisted brain and translated that to "I HEART JUNK."
I guess I really *do* need reading glasses. My version of the shirt is more interesting though.