12/12/10

The Republic of Bananas

I opened my wife's Banana Republic bill yesterday, and I saw this printed on it:



I'm not sure what that's supposed to be.

Is it supposed to be a very round lipstick kiss? A bow on a present? What?

I know what it looks like, but I'm pretty sure that's not what they were going for. I think this week there's probably going to be a staff meeting at Banana Republic, and the Director of Marketing is going to ask, "Who thought it would be a good idea to send a picture of a cat's asshole to 120,000 of our customers?"

Someone will not be getting a bonus this year.

Now I'm afraid to open my Gap bill. What if it's scratch-n-sniff?

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20 comments:

  1. YourFireAnt2:54 PM

    Probably you have to scratch it off to see what your "reward" is.

    ;-)

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  2. Ed4:19 PM

    Ha! Maybe it's both...a cat's asshole like you said, and a scratch-off reward card like YourFireAnt said.

    Sort of a scratch-N-sniff reward.

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  3. Anonymous4:53 PM

    hopefully not 'scratch and sniff'...

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  4. Johnny Virgil4:55 PM

    No, thankfully not. I'm still really not sure what they were going for.

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  5. Paige6:42 PM

    You opened your wife's credit card bill??? For shame, Mr. Virgil, for shame...

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  6. Anonymous6:48 PM

    Did you find the card hidden amongst the packaging? Who cares what it looks or smells like, FREE $$$$!!!

    Peace <3
    Jay

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  7. Faegan Harti6:48 PM

    Boy, it sure does look like Mr. Winky.

    Maybe it's a cross section of a banana?

    Strange. And more than vaguely off-putting.

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  8. Malisa9:28 PM

    Ha ha ha! Very good!

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  9. kc10:35 PM

    I think they're the ones that Perez Hilton called out for some guy being indiscreet in a slacks layout. Clearly, there's not much oversight in that Republic.

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  10. Lisa11:16 AM

    I think it's supposed to be a wreath.

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  11. kristina3:51 PM

    Before I even read the rest of your post, I thought, "A pucker on the 'thank you' note? Does that mean they think she should kiss their a$$ and be thankful she is getting this (meager) reward?"...

    No scratch and sniff chocolate starfish, please!!

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  12. Sharon Byrne10:31 PM

    Perhaps it's a work by artist Stan Murmur? Maybe Banana Republic is trying to give the gift of culture this year?

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  13. Hat12:29 PM

    I just finished your book. I bought a hard copy from Amazon. It's fan-foreskin-tastic. Feel free to use this as a testimonial.

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  14. Johnny Virgil12:53 PM

    Jay, no! No card.

    Faegan, you had me at mr. winky.

    Lisa! That could be it. I'm going to write to them and find out.

    Kristina, no, that would be too horrible to contemplate.

    Sharon, you made me google him. Now I'm sorry I did. I saw PENIS-CATTAILS. So thank you for that.

    Hat, can I bug you to leave a review on Amazon? Thanks!

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  15. Hat1:19 PM

    Sure.

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  16. Johnny Virgil1:59 PM

    Hat, you rock! Thanks

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  17. Hat2:05 PM

    Just don't go spending the whole $3 in one place.

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  18. Johnny Virgil2:08 PM

    Yeah, tell me about it. Amazon doesn't do self-publishers any favors. I just heard about another place called Scribd that is supposed to take less of a cut. And to be fair, it's $3.56. Self publishing is like opening a pizza place. You gotta sling a lot of pie to make a living.

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  19. Anonymous7:05 PM

    It sort of looks like a bullet-hole... freaky.

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  20. Morris2:43 AM

    Actually, it looks a bit like one of those star shatter marks you get when a stone hits a windscreen..
    I certainly wouldn't have thought of a cats asshole till you mentioned it. Thanks muchly... :P

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